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Two weeks ago we discussed bullying in schools - why it can be such a problem and a little bit how parents may be able to help.
In general, both schools and the law take bullying seriously, as well they should. But it's not always easy to find, or to deal with, since in general the worst of the bullying takes place when adults aren't around, and kids may not be thrilled about speaking up.
The US Department of Health and Human Services runs an initiative called "Stop Bullying Now," an initiative to try to reduce bullying through education of kids and adults alike. On the part of the website for adults, you can find a list of signs that a child is being bullied, even if he or she is reluctant to mention it. The site also has great educational activities, videos, and games to educate kids on the seriousness of the matter.
The Nemours Foundation runs a fantastic website, www.kidshealth.org, with a particularly useful article with tips for kids being bullied. Most of the tips are on page 3 and 4 of the article, but don't worry, it's short. The tips are down-to-earth and realistic, and each comes with its own explanation: work on ways to feel good about yourself. Avoid the bully where possible. Get a buddy. Don't bully back!
Once again, also, education.com provides lots of useful information for parents and students alike, including some great resources on the topic of cyberbullying, a form of bullying that can be completely invisible to adults, leave no physical evidence, but be extremely harmful psychologically. In these cases, even home isn't a safe refuge from the victimization. The site provides a factsheet on what cyberbullying might look like to an outside observer.
The best thing you can do for a child being bullied is listen, non-judgmentally. Everyone deals with conflict differently; remember that what you think may be the easiest solution may not be easy or reasonable for the child's situation. But try to listen and help with figuring out a solution - even just a stop-gap measure to ease the pressure a bit if the situation can't be completely resolved immediately.
On Thursday, we'll have some comments on how to help a bullier. Yes, bullies need support too!
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